Day Nine

From NaPoWriMo on Facebook:

Write a poem to someone you love or once loved something you never got to tell them.

Sebastian was a tuxedo cat, and the coolest damn cat that ever lived. Oh I could tell you stories, so many stories. He was, simply, a bad ass cat. He lived for over 18 years, from my college dorms in Freshman year all the way to Texas, from my teens to my 30s.
When it was his time, old age putting him in a near coma, I was talked into letting my (ex)husband hold him as he was put to sleep, so as not to taint my memories. It was a huge mistake.


Sebastian

Sebastian

I’m so sorry I didn’t hold you
When they shot you full of death
Although I know, and you knew too
You were mostly full already

I just didn’t understand
You know I’ve always taken bad advice
And it was bullshit when they said
I’d remember you better this way

I’m sorry I wasn’t the one
Stroking your face and whispering love
It was my job, my right, my vow
And I stood there just outside the window anyhow

Watching you pass into the dark
Wishing you sweet feather breezes
To set your whiskers twitching
Wishing you open fields of mice

I’m sorry I didn’t believe in myself
Or know love would make me strong
Our eighteen years together, love,
Deserved a far far holier parting than this

Goodbye.

~Liesl Dineen 2014

1 Comment

  1. Nancy Richards

    Okay, so now I am sobbing as I remember taking the same advice about Jason. I could have written this poem if I could write poetry. When we put Little down I made sure that Lorie and I held her as she took her last breath. We felt we owed her that and needed to say goodbye after 17 years. The same thing with Munchkin. So we grow and learn and that’s a good thing. That’s what life is all about.

    Reply

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